I’m in Lusaka, Zambia. It is 97 degrees and instead of red leaves falling off the trees there are flamboyant red flowers. 
We were checked for Ebola at the airport (even though it is nowhere near). 
And I ate fried caterpillars.
And this morning I preached at a church in a slum that is vibrant with praise, singing and dancing.
Sound exciting and exotic? Well maybe, but… Continue reading
It seems like spiritual formation often involves right-sizing.
There are times when we feel too small, sinful, irredeemable, insignificant, and God reminds us that we are beloved. We matter. His strength is perfected in our weakness.
But there are other times (many of them), when we get too full of ourselves. We imagine ourselves the center of the universe, the masters of control and destiny. And then, again, we need to be right-sized – to be reminded that we are a small part of God’s large story. But this in itself is a glorious thing!
“To make us feel small in the right way is a function of art; men can only make us feel small in the wrong way.” E. M. Forster” Continue reading
Today is our youngest daughter, Maggie’s 27th birthday.
Maggie is the shiny one who has friends all over the world; some she just hasn’t met yet. She’s the one “car dances” and who keeps us laughing at ourselves and playing games and celebrating life with hoopla. She’s passionate about injustice, and traditions, and a good glass of wine.
For her on her birthday I want to shout “Huzzah!” and give her this sign I saw yesterday that said:
Always keep your beautiful imagination & exquisite humor.
I want to send a plane full of peanut butter M&M’s to scatter around her town so she’ll find them everywhere – nuggets of grace.
I want to go with her on fun new adventures to quirky spots like we’ve done in the past.
And I want to remind her of what I wrote her two years ago because it still holds true – what I would say to her and to my own 27 year old self…
Dear Magpie,
Don’t let this discourage you, but the older you get the more you’ll know how much you don’t know…how little you’re sure of. That’s ok though because it will help you to ask good questions, listen hard, and strain to hear God’s voice through His Word and others.
And as you do, you can remain certain of at least these three things.
1. You really do matter. The world is big and you’re so small, but even your little choices make a difference. Don’t ever “despise the day of small things” done with great love. Remember the theory that a butterfly flapping its wings in one part of the world can set in motion a chain of events that will lead to a hurricane somewhere else? Flap your wings. You matter.
2. Everything really will be ok. You’ve made mistakes before and you’ll make them again, and some days you’ll be sure the sky is falling, but the longer you live the more you will remember that the One who hung the stars is still on duty, holding them in place.
You’ll experience His mercies, new every morning. Again and again. Ever faithful. He really does cause all things to work together for good, even when that’s painful. And He really can redeem anything. Anything.
3. You are not alone. Even when you feel most alone. When someone has hurt you or betrayed you or you’ve lost something. No, no one has lived your story, but others have had chapters with similar themes of loss or fear or conflict or joy, and God has given them to you as companions, as well as Himself. He’s the sure thing. You are beloved.
Sweetie, anyone can write these words, but you will have to live them into your bones. I know that you will. You will stretch and ask and risk and hope and pray.
And you will run your race “not somehow, but triumphantly“. Surrounded by a “great cloud of witnesses” cheering you on. With Daddy and me in the front row.
Happy Birthday Magpie.
The other day I sit down at Starbucks feeling a tad sorry for myself, because I’m not with the cool kids talking about all the important things. Flashbacks to the Jr. High lunchroom. Are you with me?
I’m feeling a little jealous of all of those “living large and loud”, being seen and heard and achieving the big stuff. Heck, let’s call it what it really is: self-absorption.
I’m journalling. Talking to the Story-writer of my life, asking for a CLIMACTIC EVENT, when I look down and see the pen that I’m using. It is from a training center in Bethlehem, inscribed in English and Arabic. And I stop. So…convicted. Continue reading
I read another list last week. Twenty Women Leaders Under 40 You should Know.
There are so many of these lists it’s hard to keep them straight. But in case you’re wondering, I’m not on this list and you probably aren’t either. Especially if you’re a guy.
I’m not under 40. I don’t speak to thousands of people. I’m not beautiful or edgy or cool or a dynamic leader. I don’t have hordes of “followers”. I don’t belong on the list. I had no remote expectation or even awareness that there WAS a list til I stumbled across it. But still…I felt less than when I read it. Can you relate?
There are some great women on that list! Some of them I consider to be friends and I’m thrilled that they are being affirmed, but still…after I felt “small” in comparison, I got angry. I got angry and I considered titling this post, “Lists are from the Devil”. But then I thought that was a tad dramatic and would make me sound like one of those crazy “fundies”. Honestly though, I think that title would be pretty accurate.
What do lists like this accomplish? Twenty women feel special and important and the millions of people not on THE LIST who are making small courageous, sacrificial choices, sometimes just “showing up” each day, are tempted to believe the lie that Satan loves to whisper.
YOU know the whisper: “They matter, but you don’t.”
So, I’m publishing my own list. My list is made up of the 7 billion people in the world who will never be on a list that is Tweeted about or written up in a newspaper or magazine. My list is The Top 7 Billion People You Should Know About.
My list includes Betsy who has MS, but painfully crawls out of bed each day with the help of a caregiver and prays for others in our church.
And Eric who is 12 and moved here from another country, with English as his 4th language, trying to ignore the taunts of other adolescent boys as he struggles to learn to read.
Rhonda is on my list. A young woman who moved to Indonesia 20 years ago with her husband and eventually, kids, living sacrificially to serve the Muslim people with the love of Jesus.
And Loveness, Givison, Michael, and Sakina, our World Vision sponsored children in remote parts of the world for whom each day is a mountain of poverty to climb.
There’s Christopher too. A young man with a good heart who’s stumbling through life, grasping, searching for God though he doesn’t know it.
And you. You are on my list because wherever you are in the world you need to know you matter.
You may have wounds that no one knows about and challenges that no one sees and you’ll make brave choices and small sacrifices today. You’ll make mistakes too and you’ll fall down and stub your toe but you’ll get back up and keep going.
Yes, keep going.
Bottom line? I don’t think God is a god of lists (at least not this kind). Lists seem to be too much like assigning “places of honor at the table”…not exactly a kingdom deal. So it really it’s no biggie that you’re on “my” list, but maybe the this will make a difference…
“You have searched me, Lord, and you Know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you Lord, know it completely. You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me.” Ps. 139:1-5.
If God has a list, you’re on it. How do you make it? Just breathe. And know that you matter. You are loved.
A friend of mine has 52,216 followers on Twitter. Another has 36,333.
Last time I looked, I had 42 :).
That doesn’t bother me, but this on another friend’s blog…
Hmmm… Deep breath.
There are days when I’m humming along, feeling pretty good, and then, even accidentally sometimes, I’ll see a number, and I turn small and envious, and discontent.
I’m embarrassed to admit this, but am I the only one? Which numbers affect your sense of well-being? Number of dates you’ve had in the last year? The number on your scale? Number of days since your kids called? Number of sales? Number of friends on Facebook?
So Monday I read, “Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.” Ps. 20:7
I don’t know about you, but there aren’t many horses or chariots in my neighborhood, so it is not a temptation for me to trust that Charlton Heston is going to come careening down my street, whip in hand, vanquishing all my foes, cleaning up all my insecurities.
But there IS the temptation to trust in other things.
I’m wondering…if this verse were written today (no, I’m not changing scripture, just wondering) might it read:
“Some trust in ‘followers’, ‘likes’, ‘hits’, ‘friends’ and full email boxes, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.”
But here’s a hard question. What does that look like? Trusting in God? And not being derailed by either praise or the lack of it?
How do I resist having praise go straight to my head and criticism straight to my heart?
A couple of years ago I learned about a “Welcoming Prayer”, originated by Mary Mrozowski, that I have adapted and personalized for my own use most mornings. Maybe part of trusting God is reminding ourselves and preparing for the battle we face each day.
Here’s my version of the Welcoming Prayer, prayed with hands open upwards:
Holy Spirit, Welcome.
I let go of my need for affirmation and approval…
I let go of my need for recognition from…(This is the most important part for me. I insert here, specific people or places I’m tempted to look to for approval)
Holy Spirit, Welcome.
I let go of my need for power and control…
I let go of my need to change…(I insert here, specific people or situations I’m tempted to try to control)
Holy Spirit, Welcome.
Find rest my soul, in God alone.
For my hope comes from Him.
He alone is my rock and my salvation,
He is my fortress; I will not be shaken.
My salvation and my honor depend on God;
He is my mighty rock, my refuge. Psalm 62:5-7
Lord, help me to be a follower instead of seeking followers. You are enough.
Which derails you most often? Praise or the lack of it?
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