Tag: self-centeredness

Why Are People So Mean These Days and What Can We Do?

October 8, 2022 /

Living life in 2022 is really hard. I know people tell you that. And they’re right. Everyone just seems meaner.

I’m convinced we’re in a global season of the “terrible two’s”.

We’re just so tired of not getting our way, that we’re all throwing tantrums and grasping for any little thing we can possibly control.

We’re tired of Covid restrictions, and worrying about Ukraine and nuclear war, the stock market, and having to pay high gas prices, and weary of trusting leaders who let us down.

We all have a little kingdom and we want a sense of being king (or queen), darn it! We want to exercise our rule and right now it’s all about us.

So we rail at the barista who got our drink wrong,

or rant to our friend about all the changes the CEO of an organization is making,

or we write our pastor to let him know in no uncertain terms that he hasn’t said enough,

or he’s said too much about ___________(you fill in the blank).

We yell at the person who is riding his bike on the sidewalk, because you’re NOT SUPPOSED TO DO THAT!

We (I 😬) major on truth without grace.

We abuse the idea of “boundaries” (a good thing), using it as an excuse to cancel at the last minute because we don’t feel like doing something. It’s one choice we can make, in a world out of our control, so we do.

That family tradition of celebrating Thanksgiving together? “Well, there are too many people, and I’m an introvert, so I don’t want to come anymore.” (Note: not me, but the hypothetical person I”m writing about). “I just want choices”. And it’s all about what’s best for me.

We’re angry and frustrated, and we want to let everyone know.

It’s hard, but I’m trying to ask these questions:

  • What is this anger really about? Why am I so worked up? Or why are they? What’s the thing beneath the thing?

  • How important is this as part of the bigger story God is writing?

  • What are some constructive, God-honoring choices I do have?

  • What am I hoping the choice I’m making will accomplish?

Breathe in: Almighty God, Prince of Peace

Breathe out: Help me to be gentle with others.

A Near Death Experience

November 19, 2012 /

There’s a prerequisite for heaven.  It’s called death.

You remember that line from the movie, Princess Bride?  “There’s dead and then there’s mostly dead.”

The other day I realized I was only mostly dead.  Or even less than that.  Maybe just a smidge dead.

But I wanted to be SEEN as totally dead.  Dead to self.  To selfishness.  To self-centeredness.

Several times in the course of two days I gave time and effort and gave up comfort to go out of my way and serve someone.

And you know what?  It didn’t seem to matter at all.  No one said “thanks”, much less threw a parade.

The kid I tutor was rude and uncooperative.  The meal I made for someone didn’t fit their dietary restrictions.  And, and, and…

And my bratty 13-year-old self, wanted a high five or at least a little “Woohoo!” from Jesus.  And by that I mean from everyone around me.

The main person I really wanted to serve was myself.

I wanted the image of serving others, and the perk of being noticed and admired.

I wanted it to look like I had a shiny outside but my inside was pretty gross…maggoty in fact.

Have you ever recognized this in yourself?  Maybe once?

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