So you’ve done the running around and the shopping and cleaning and baking and now we’re getting close to the time when family will be arriving at your house, or you’ll be traveling to theirs.

Our daughter Maggie arrived this morning at 3:30 a.m. to spend a few days before she heads to Texas to be with her in-laws, and Katy arrives Saturday.

Sometimes we’re so stressed and busy during the holidays that we don’t really reflect on what we want to have happen while we’re together – you know, how to be truly present to each other. Then before we know it Christmas is over, family is gone and we’re left thinking “woulda-coulda-shoulda”.

So I got to thinking about questions I want to make sure to ask when we’re around the dinner table, or at the coffee shop.IMG_6639

They’re questions for kids to ask parents and parents to ask kids (grown kids or little kids).  Maybe they’ll be helpful to you too.

1.  What do you think about…?  One of our highest values is taking the posture of a learner.  We want to be enriched by hearing different perspectives even when we might not completely agree.

2.  Remember that great time when…?  Family memories are such a gift and the re-telling of stories bonds us together with laughter and tears.

3.  What’s the biggest challenge you’re facing these days?  I have to be careful that I don’t make assumptions here.  This may open the door for conversation in areas I’m not aware of, and that’s a good thing.

4.  How can I pray for you?  This may tie directly into #3.  Or not.

5. Do I tell you enough that I love you?

Maybe one question NOT to ask is “When are you going to…?” (get pregnant, get married, get a job, graduate, lose weight… 🙂 )

What questions would you add that you’d like to ask?